Sunday, June 04, 2006

Starlight Parade

final count: 22 and 1/2

7 comments:

Scott said...

It'd be a full 23 in the Netherlands.

Adrianna said...

Or Utah.

Ken said...

Bullshit. At best, you watched them blink rain out of their face. Without photographic evidence... Idonbelieve.

Ben said...

I know Ken, this sort of sheer animal magnetism seems kind of farfetched, especially for a man with your track record. Let me clear it up with a metaphor that seemed to help Pat. Princesses, and girls in general, are like electromagnets and you my friend, are a Jello-O mold. I wouldn't be too much better, but I have a lucky princess shirt, which I guess would be like a suit of armor.

I'd love to loan it to ya man, but Cynda already malignantly ruined my lucky poker hat and I think God might be angry if I let this shirt fall into the wrong hands. I mean, I use it for good, enhancing the parade spirit and all, and I can only imagine what purposes you would put it to. I can't in good faith let the queen of the maryville strawberry festival fall into your hands. But whatever, don't believe if it makes you feel better about yourself. It's not like there weren't witnesses.

Well, no one was there to witness the kiss the strawberry queen blew me. She must have known how much I love strawberries...

God, I love parades.

Ken said...

(yes mike, we know that's a simile.) I know a lot about electromagnets, my friend, and I also know about jell-o (or jello-o, sure) molds. They are metallic and often ferromagnetic, not to mention extremely light. Where a heavy suit of armor would respond somewhat sluggishly to an induced magnetic field, a jell-o mold would zip right up to it. Also, you can't in good faith claim to have been enhacing parade spirit by objectifying these women. You just reduced the queen of the strawberry festival, a girl who I'm sure has a charming personality and a long list of accomplishments, to what Christopher Walken refers to as "a notch in your belt." Yeah, I bet you're real proud of yourself.

Ben said...

haha, i love you ken

you know i meant a big shiverring mass of jello.

i knew i shouldn't've respond though, you're too goddamn smart. or at least really talented at twisting people's words around. my mom's right, you should go into politics.

Ken said...

Over three hours of deliberations have led me to the conclusion that Ben's conquests are real and honorable, Ben's shirt is magical, and my existence is (with some rounding error) equivalent to a shivering mass of jell-o.