Wednesday, October 11, 2006

"Scott, You Are Our God!"

It's not everyday you hear such words. But today was one such day, a day when that phrase was uttered several times. Many, even. I even received the following notes on my door...

Scott, you are our god! We will have your BABIES, both of us (1120). This pass entitles you to one free 3some. WE LOVE YOU GOD

The second note came later.

Scott, you are my God. I will have your babies any day of the week! Let's get it on sometime soon. I'm squirming in anticipation. - Nicole

Now, aside from the random hallway "hello," I have no real preexisting relationship with these kind people. I'm not even entirely sure I know Nicole, although there are a number of the Frosh population I know but whose names were never given. What could have prompted them to post such flattering notes upon my otherwise-empty door?

I'll tell you what.

TiVo.

See, I had TiVo all set to go in my room before I was informed that splitting my broadband connection was a violation of Emerson policy, and I could very well be kicked off the network. But instead of letting God's own device go to waste in my room, I set it up in the common room. I expected a positive reaction, but nothing like this. I post not to say that I am at all superior, but rather to let you know just how powerful TiVo's hold is over us all.

P.S. I posted this here rather than The Rail because The Rail is automatically posted to Facebook, and the last thing I need is anyone at Emerson getting the wrong idea about the post. My buddy Aaron already exclaimed in front of several girls "Dude, you TOTALLY did this to get laid!"

4 comments:

imac said...

That sucks about not being able to split broadband. I personally would be screwed if we had that policy because we have what basically amounts to an internet hub.

Ben said...

Damn single-sex dorms!

Rachel said...

ben, i'm sure some dudes on your floor would sleep with you if you offered them tivo...?

Chuck said...

so what you are saying is tivo is better than alcohol huh? hahahahaha