Friday, December 07, 2012

If You Only Watch One Internet Movie This Year...

I'm sure my feelings towards sampling, music videos, and possibly even crazy-dancing-in-public videos are pretty clear, but there's a dance movie set entirely to the music of Girl Talk called Girl Walk // All Day that is the best thing ever. You can watch the whole thing online at their website, but I posted the first chapter below.


Monday, December 03, 2012

Tuesday, November 27, 2012

Chess Club Resurrected. Now 70% Less Acne!



Above: Cory is currently kicking my butt on gameknot.com

Tim is joining soon, so you all should get in on the action.  Cory and I have it set on 3 days to return a move, but you can make it less or more time.  It has been a lot of fun.  We should do Words with Friends or something else too, for the chess-averse.  

I wish there was a better Settlers of Catan application (supposedly they're working on an iPad version) but if anybody wants to download the playcatan.com program, I'd love to play with you and the random Canadians and Dutch kids who use that.  It is unfortunately in real-time, but it can move pretty briskly, especially in 3-person games.  I can't tell you how satisfying it is to beat Germans at their own game.  And if nothing else, the graphics will make you miss the days of Windows 95:



Tuesday, November 20, 2012

Help Steph make/win the playoffs!


Q. Was picking up MJD *and* Pierre Garcon a reasonable gamble moving into the postseason?

Any advice moving forward would be greatly appreciated.  She is winning our division but just the fourth best team right now and the guy on the bubble behind her is just 1 game back.  She definitely needs a TE now that Gronk, her MVP, is down for the next few weeks at least.  Clearly dropping the kicker to add either Brandon Myers or Kyle Rudolph unless anyone has any better ideas.




I'm here for my 7:00 public shaming


I had a Sunday morning meltdown and sat ANDRE FUCKING JOHNSON the game he decides to score 7 Sundays worth of work.  Second time I have panicked, sat him, and lost.  So tired of 3-8 point games.  I hope that by outing myself here I will learn my lesson.  I now am mathematically eliminated from fantasy playoffs.  Mea maxima culpa.

SEACAPTAINDATE.COM // Are YOU a Yellow Submariner?





courtesy of Stephanie, who apparently is "trolling" for a more sea-worthy husband

Saturday, November 03, 2012

Top Five Things Ingredients in a Kanye Song

In light of the disappointment of Cruel Summer and the possibly upcoming Cruel Winter, I've cobbled together a template for a successful Yeezy joint, in case he actually wants to capitalize on his mogul aspirations:

5. OPTIONAL BUT RECOMMENDED: Chorus via Frank Ocean, Dwele, T-Pain, Mr Hudson, John Legend, Rihanna, etc.  Weirdly, apparently not Beyonce

4. Verse from somebody brasher/rawer i.e. Ross, Jeezy, Cam

3.  Verse from somebody smarter/smoother i.e. Pusha, Jay, TI, Freddie fucking Gibbs already.

2. Militant beat

1. Awesome marching band horn line

MOST IMPORTANT: No Big Sean.  No Cyhi. Cudi only on chorus duty. Fabolous borderline.  Your crew needs serious work.   NO SCRUBS, YE.

Monday, October 29, 2012

Thanks, Delaware!

The correct answer is clearly Oregon.  Nice to see some Big 12 unity, though.  And they apparently have at least 573 working Internet connections in West Virginia.  More than I would have expected. still only 400 more than Alaska or Wyoming :-(   come on Mountain Mama!

UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE!

IOWA IS IN PLAY.  REPEAT, IOWA IS IN PLAY!


Tuesday, October 23, 2012

Top Five Favorite Cardinals Players

In light of being trolled by both Doug and Pat within 24 hours (great minds think alike) I hereby publish a short list of the Redbirds who've had the biggest impact on me in my short but intense time following the team.

5. Allen Craig- on any other team he would be the clutchest

4. David Freese- indisputably greatest postseason run in baseball history

3. Chris Carpenter- Would rather lose with him than win with Verlander.

2. Lance "Fat Elvis" "Big Puma" Berkman- doesn't get nearly enough credit for his Series

1. Yadier Molina- best catcher in the league and he plays with a level of joy that's unheard of at the professional level

Thursday, October 18, 2012

Best Book I've Read in 5+ Years



The Amazing Adventures of Kavalier & Clay

Read it.


I knew Chabon was an immensely talented writer, but a novel like this is an unreal human achievement, with the prose fireworks of Salman Rushdie and triple the heart. I cannot recommend it highly enough, especially for someone with a love of comic books.  Don't let the size scare you, it flies and like me, you will be devastated not by the sublimely beautiful ending, but by its ending.

Full disclosure: I used to walk around Berkeley hoping I'd see the dude, but I never ran into him.  Not even at the comics shop.

Thursday, October 11, 2012

Top Five Sports I Cared About More Than the NFL.... Until Fantasy Football Came Into My Life

5. MLfuckingS 4. NHL 3. MLB 2. NBA 1. College Football

dumbest woman in America?


"WASHINGTON — Abigail Fisher is a slight young woman with strawberry blond hair, a smile that needs little prompting, a determined manner and a good academic record. She played soccer in high school, and she is an accomplished cellist." and TWO COUNT'EM TWO LAZY EYES girlfriend is whining she didn't get into a school that admitted, and passed for 3 years, VINCE FUCKING YOUNG. dumbest QB in NFL history.

Even Florida knows


Bust What?




ps Bing.  thoughts?  

I have #1 & #3. I am 0-5.



On the other hand, I did grab and start GB WR James Jones this week for Steph, and his 2 TDs won her game for her.  So I think I'll resign myself to ghost-managing her team

Monday, October 01, 2012

The Patent-Pending Adam Morrison Quote Generator


"I don't always drink beer, but when I do, it's my own fermented urine....

Okay, yeah, first you have to precipitate out the ammonia.  Or boil it out I suppose, but you lose a lot of subtleties that way....

Reverse electrolysis is also an option.....

Oh yeah, it goes through my system ten, twenty times.  I've got a twelve-year put away that could go head to head with Chimay, in my opinion.....

Mmhmm, well I was doing this far before Breaking Bad, so I don't really see the connection.....

Well yes, I *have* recondensed the ammonia, purely out of curiousity, and used it in a Birch reduction to create meth.  I've had better, to be honest.  Bit of a disappointment."

BLAZERS 2012-2013 MAKE ME PROUD

ps Adam "The Franchise" Morrison on his chances making the team. STIRRING STUFF.




Wednesday, September 05, 2012

my team


Anybody else have a fantasy football team going?  Any suggestions for a first-timer?

Playing with Berkeley folks plus Pete "The Slapper" O'Malley.  That includes Steph, who I'm matched up with this week.  I'm *was* favored by 1 point, but then I suggested she start Hakeem Nicks instead of Michael Crabtree so now she's projected to beat me by 9.



Monday, July 30, 2012

New Hit Game Show Proposal! Which Douchebag Does Ben Hate More?

THE CHALLENGER (Mr. NoName cuddling with Hermione Granger)



THE REIGNING CHAMPION AND SCARF ENTHUSIAST (Ruthless dictator Bashar al-Assad)




My roommate Mike would be the Ken Jennings of this game.






Secret answer::¡ɹǝʇʇǝq ʍouʞ pןnoɥs noʎ  ¡ɥsıʇıɹq ǝɹɐ noʎ ɥɔʇıq  ¡ǝɟıʍ s,pɐssɐ ¡uoıʇsǝnb ʞɔıɹʇ

Friday, July 13, 2012

Huge Fucking Reward Offered*

THE BEST SHOW OF OUR CHILDHOOD
Did YOU watch it before school?
Ian went on his sixth or seventh birthday.**

And he won the motherfucking smile contest.***
Can YOU find photographic evidence for me?**** 

Wait...you found it?  Really?  Merry Christmas, indeed! 
NO, NOT YOU BECKY, YOU DUMB TWAT, I WANT IAN!




 *By Pat
**I am not sure how factually accurate I am being
***Rigged by Luis?
****Cynda, perhaps they are in the gun safe?


ps
Look at this psycho kid in the green shirt.  Now go make sure your front door is locked.

Saturday, May 26, 2012

Doug and Sandi's wedding blog and email list

So, in case you haven't heard, Sandi and I are getting married and we are inviting all of you to join our wedding email list. Once we get all of our emails together, we are going to mail our invitations to what is going to be a very virtual wedding experience. We will be marrying out of the country, but want to keep all of our friends and family involved as much as possible and to that end will be keeping a blog and communicating by email. So, if you are interested in joining the mailing list, please email us at our gmail account: Doug and Sandi Wedding. Or start following us at the blogspot account of the same name, where we have uploaded a video of our engagement pictures and will be updating regularly. We are looking forward to sharing this experience with all of you!

Sunday, May 06, 2012

not a threat

attn Magda: Gravy wants rights to the Renoir-Noah.  or else...



ok, kind of a threat.

Friday, May 04, 2012

@ the Oregon zoo



great quote from the new BBC Sherlock about this:
"Bravery is by far the kindest word for stupidity" -Mycroft Holmes

Monday, April 16, 2012

Prayers

Just got a message from Schneider:
"On a more somber note not sure if you heard Mike Rhoads got shot in Afghanistan yesterday. He is doing okay and after a stint in Germany, he will be coming home."

Please pray for Mike's recovery. I believe he was a Marine, I hope that means he'll be safe in Bethesda soon. Link is an article about a coordinated Taliban attack yesterday. Also, Devon is shipping out soon so keep him in your thoughts as well. I'll defer to Colonel on who the patron saint of soldiers is, but Ignatius was one so that can't hurt.

Thursday, April 05, 2012

Tuesday, March 20, 2012

New Endeavors!

Hey team! You should head over to the sidebar and check out Scott's new work on the superb Criterion Cast website and Rachel's really excellent site for her stage work. Her sets are amazing, better than what I've seen from the San Francisco Opera. There are some cool new looks for The Spitfire Grill play we ran senior year.

ps
At the Lux has made its triumphant return to cyberspace as a repository for pictures of Doug's beard. Email me if you have any particularly sexy ones plz and thank you.

Tuesday, March 06, 2012

Safety Not Guaranteed

Today I was at a screening and Q & A with the director, screenwriter and Aubrey Plaza (April Ludgate) for the film Safety Not Guaranteed, and yes, Aubrey in person is exactly like her character in Parks and Rec.

The film was surprisingly emotional and really keeps you guessing until the very end. I highly recommend it. It's an indie film, but I think they said it will release in theaters in June.

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Favorite Songs of 2011


Missed the cut: Drake ft. Rick Ross - "Lord Knows"


Bonus:
Robyn mashed-up with Whitney Houston (RIP)


Honorable Mention: Toby Keith - "Red Solo Cup"


Runner Up: Charli XCX - "Nuclear Seasons"



10. Cold Cave - "The Great God Pan is Dead"

9. EMA - "Grey Ships"



8. My Morning Jacket - "Circuital"


7. Das Racist - "Booty in the Air"


6. Nicki Minaj - "Superbass"


5. Britney Spears [ft. Nicki Minaj & Ke$ha] - "Till the World Ends (The Femme Fatale Remix)"


4. Wilco - "One Sunday Morning (Song for Jane Smiley's Boyfriend)"


3. Jamie xx and Gil-Scott Heron - "I'll Take Care of U" (which Drake & Rihanna jump on to great success)




2. Watch the Throne - "Why I Love You"



1. Holy Ghost! - "Jam for Jerry"


ps for the preservation of my friendship with Ian, I will not include Katy Perry - "Last Friday Night (T.G.I.F.)" I cannot. or Avril Lavinge - "What the Hell" no way.

Sunday, February 12, 2012

Favorite TV of 2011

Missed the Cut: The Layover
Honorable Mention: The Office
Runner-up: No Reservations


10. The Good Wife
9. Game of Thrones
8. 30 Rock
7. Downton Abbey
6. Archer
5. Justified
4. Boardwalk Empire
3. Parks & Recreation
2. Mad Men (placeholder for Breaking Bad)
1. Community

Friday, February 10, 2012

Favorite Films of 2011

Going to see Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy and The Artist this week fingers crossed. click the link for Scott's a-tad-more-authoritative list.

Missed the cut: The Ides of March

Honorable Mention: The Descendents got to me. feel like I've been to Hawaii

Runner-Up: 50/50 for hosting some great Rogan moments and making Seattle look habitable.

10. Terry: John C. Reilly>Clooney in the head-to-head of lost husbands shipwrecked among youths
9. Drive: Action hasn't looked so good since.....
8. Everything Must Go: Along with Stranger than Fiction, Ferrell reveals himself as a more compelling dramatic lead than Penn
7. Moneyball: feel like I should mention Jonah Hill, if only because I'm shouting out every other schlub I love
6. Another Earth: Gorgeously captures fall, winter and spring in Connecticut. hottest high school janitor ever
------->The Artist<-------
------->Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy<-------
5. Green Hornet: Seth Rogan can deliver a goddamn line. It helps when he writes them.
4. The Muppets: Jason Segel is a boss. you know the through-line of friendships just drifting away unless you work at them got to me.
3. Midnight in Paris: Indulgent yet light on it's feet
2. Tree of Life: too beautiful for words. I wanted to spend ages in the Texas Malick made. would have bought admission for a third time, but I dreaded the Penn scenes. They probably weren't that bad, but when they yank you out of a summer twilight in the 60's that puts Mad Men to shame...
1. Bridesmaids: never laughed so much in a theater AND it dealt with middle-class poverty in a real way.

Wednesday, February 08, 2012

Favorite Albums of 2011

Comically late. Still playing lots of catch-up resulting from being computer-less for 10 months of the year. Time and tide wait for no man.

Missed the Cut: Drake- Take Care
Honorable Mention: Hilarious- Louis C.K.
Runner-Up: Street Halo EP- Burial

10. Relax- Das Racist
9. Circuital- My Morning Jacket
8. Civilian- Wye Oak
7. Collapse Into Now- R.E.M.
6. Born This Way- Lady Gaga
5. 808's and Dark Grapes- Main Attrakionz
4. Native Speaker- Braids
3. Watch the Throne- Watch the Throne
2. Past Lives Martyred Saints- EMA
1. Bon Iver, Bon Iver- Bon Iver

Thursday, January 19, 2012

Yo Pat, You Survive?

How was waterboarding bro?? Was it worse than the HALF of a habenero fritter that almost killed ya?

speaking of, guess which three studs completed the Salvadore Molly's Great Balls of Fire habenero pepper eating championship and are now enshrined on the Wall of Flame?:

THESE FELLAS {note: I look slightly better on the official picture. Mike looks just as handsome. Tim looks like he's gonna ralph on our shoes}

EDIT EDIT EDIT!! Magda found our immortalized mugs!




ps I heard this song for the first about this time last year. It became the mantra that got me thru the toughest times. maybe it can do the same for you:



love you knuckleheads

pps
my new anthem? I AIN'T TURNING DOWN NOTHING BUT MY COLLAR, YOU SEE


New Zealand knows what's up