So yesterday sucked. Woke up feeling way, way tired. Anybody else experience that, where you're pretty sure that you weren't supposed to wake up because the majority of your body is still functioning in sleep mode? I was like that. My stomach was in no condition to down a substantial amount of food, despite the fact that I would desperately need the energy. Instead, my breakfast consisted of a glass of milk. Then I rushed to school to study for a history test. Needless to say, this did not happen. Instead I read an essay for AP English that was stupid. Maybe it had good points, but I was in a cantankerous mood; I was in no way willing to admit that I enjoyed English homework. And I never studied. So I walked into English feeling confident.
But wait! We aren't analyzing that essay, or the other one. No, we're peer-editing other people's essays. Okay, this is cool. It was sad, though, because I couldn't find great comments to make. My mind didn't function. On the plus side, I did get decent feedback on my essay, which was arguing the opening statement of Thoreau's "Civil Disobedience", which was nice because at that point I hadn't actually read the essay. Bio as always made me want to sleep. I had Spanish, which was fine, but I was exhausted. Same with math. Then came choir, which was great until I realized I'd made Sam Wasson get a bad grade on our choir test on account of my bad musical ear. But then I had the history exam. That was...interesting. And then I had practice for this choir workshop on Saturday. It's a quartet. I'm the one bass. And I'm not a low bass; just baritone. My timing was always off, I always slid flat, and then I just totally couldn't find the notes in the second song. I was very pissed at myself. A couple of hours later I headed off to soccer practice.
Okay, having not played a man-to-man defense in any team sport since the age of eleven, I got surprised when I learned that's how we're apparently supposed to play in regular soccer. I always marked up for throw-ins, corner kicks, or whatever, but for regular parts of the game; I played zone. If there was a player in my zone and posed a threat, I would be wary. Otherwise, I kept my attention on the ball. I understand that it's probably not the best way, but one of my teammates told me in no uncertain terms that what I was doing was wrong and, it felt, probably punishable by death (dramatic, I know; but perhaps you have not picked up on the fact that this was a rather shitty day), so I stopped. But wait! Having not played this way in such a long time, I am not doing as well as I might have been doing with my usual routine. Yet for some reason the coach had me stay in. I was incredibly pissed at the end of this. I could have played until like midnight and probably still want more, because I just needed something more. But then it was time to go home, and do homework, and then I had to go to sleep instead of go for a run, because running at is like a stimulant in the short-term; gets the blood flowing.
So yeah, it was a bad day compounded by my standards for myself...though those aren't too high in actuality.
But about the title...I'm referring to the onslaught of stuff coming at me. A religion project that I have to do well on, because if I don't work hard I will get up there and stammer and give the impression of being a guy who just screws around in class. Which I'm not. Then I have English...have to write an essay sometime soon. That will suck. And there's this whole choir workshop, which is taking up a lot of time because of my inability to hit notes. Which, I figure, will probably be a very, very bad thing when I get up in front of the Jesuit community and try to be a cantor. Crap.
It's a miracle I have a shred of optimism in my veins....aside from the obvious fact that it's far from the end of the world.
So yeah, done with that...that's my allotment of self-pity for the month.
1 comment:
Dude, I didn't think you were that worried about the man to man. Yeah, in general it is best for a defensive line to match up with forwards, midfield to midfield, etc. Unfortunatley, with the amount of practice and conditioning we get, it is pretty rare that mids will move back to mark up every play. Most of the time its four of us taking on six attackers. Then you have to play a zone and worry about their best players. You're a good defender. Just follow your gut and stay in front (alongside) of the guy with the ball (or if the nearest good player to you doesn't have the ball just stick with him). He will make a mistake or take a bad shot because your pressure and because, let's face it, you're One Touch McGraw.
post script
This is blogging dude. Self-pity normally comes out bi-daily. I think you're safe for any posts in the near future.
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